Belle de hiver.

Dreamworld.

2010-04-07T14:46:00.000-07:00

I`ve been staying at a wonderful, quiet cottage, and I`ve had the most wonderful days in a soo long time. I`ll tell you more about it later.

L.A easter

2010-03-30T03:44:00.000-07:00

ellieswellies

Easter in L.A: I`m going away.
To a place without internet, without TV, without people.
I`ll be back. Someday.

xoxo

Repeating myself.

2010-03-23T06:31:00.000-07:00

I admit it. Again.
I am lonely here in L.A.
L.A doesn`t fit me,
or,
I don`t fit L.A.

Maybe I`ll move home to Norway soon.
When the sun comes back.
I miss my friends.
I miss my family.
I even miss school.

Don`t know how i would survived without Signe and Avy

Change

2010-03-19T02:56:00.000-07:00

Photo: pearled

My L.A life has been about:
drinks
partying
my mad auntie
a none existing lovelife
chanel
books
miumiu

Nothing has changed.

Watching

2010-03-17T04:28:00.000-07:00

Kamy Lisy

My aunt doesn`t get better
and I am not working.
Sitting in my window sill, watching
the gardener that once smiled at me
the cat chasing something
the wind
the grass
the sun

Rain

2010-03-14T01:11:00.000-08:00

sanaa h

I read this blog, and started remembering how it is to dance in the rain. It gives me the best feeling ever, feeling the wet grass against my feet. Feeling the drops against my skin.

Sick

2010-03-12T06:30:00.000-08:00

Lucy Frances

My aunt is sick.
She doesn`t eat.
She doesn`t speak.
She don`t ever work-out (which is her obsession).
I can`t sleep.

Fortune.

2010-03-09T16:47:00.000-08:00

Today I gave away a fortune:
myy Chanel
my Burberry
my Miumiu
my Dior

to someone who need it far more than me.

Cure

2010-03-07T14:49:00.001-08:00

I have to go back to doing good things again, to cure my loneliness.
What can I do?
Who shall I help?

Dance/Dance/Dance

2010-03-06T12:43:00.000-08:00

kmsYES
Where shall I go out to dance, tonight? Give me your best tips!

Medicine

2010-03-03T11:48:00.000-08:00

One of my daily medicines now a days.

Being good v.s being drunk

2010-03-01T10:16:00.000-08:00

I haven`t stopped doing nice things, just been drinking too much, and hanging out w/Melkehvit, Sara and Signe. M is going home soon, I guess I`ll feel lonely again when she leaves.

At least I`ll be focusing on being good again.

Love&kiss

2010-02-26T14:48:00.000-08:00

Photo: private

I like L.A a littlebit better when Melkehvit is here. She helps me connect a little more with other people here, that she knows.

Yesterday we kissed the barguy to get drinks for the rest of the night, and tonight she`ll sleep at my place if my aunt stabile enough to have guests.

Do

2010-02-24T04:11:00.001-08:00

So what am I doing these days?
Dancing with strangers
Running in the streets, when it`s dark
Reading Virginia Woolf
... and now I`m just about to go to bed...

Fuck the pain away.

2010-02-21T13:46:00.000-08:00

Today (as always), I want to drink away my pain. Hopefully I`ll induce Melkehvitt and Signe to join me..

I`ve done one nice thing today: Made a big lunch for M.

<3

List.

2010-02-19T14:11:00.000-08:00

Photo: Melkehvit
I went to Signe`s apartment today, too meet my friend. Signe`s mom was there, so it felt like we were a little European family in L.A (although i`m not in their family). I`m trying to do good things with Melkehvitt, she`s writing a list right now.. MM.

Milkshake & friends

2010-02-18T14:15:00.000-08:00

rusted

Today I`ve been hanging out with my friend Melkehvitt. We`ve been travelling around in the city, shopping and drinking strawberrymilkshake. Mm!

The nice things I`ve done today:
Smiled to strangers
Opened doors for old ladys

Things to do:

2010-02-15T16:59:00.000-08:00

Think about it !

Milk

2010-02-14T04:27:00.000-08:00

Photo: ?

I`m tired and it`s late, way too late. My friend from Norway, Uteerdetmelkehvitt, is coming to L.A this week. She`ll be living with her aunt and cousin, but I guess we`ll hang out A LOT. Wow, how I miss her!!

Cats

2010-02-11T12:39:00.000-08:00

Today I feed some hungry and homeless cats. I should have given them a home, but I don`t know anyone who wants them, and my aunt only allow certain catraces...

Have you been doing something nice today?

Why my aunt is sad.

2010-02-10T14:40:00.000-08:00

I don`t know the real reason to why she is sad, she got what she needs (?): a big house, children, a husband, lots of maids etc. Maybe L.A is making her sad. Sometimes she reminds me of Anna Anka, so obsessed of being the perfect wife, mother, person.. Someday I`ll try ask her what`s wrong.

How can I help?

2010-02-08T09:52:00.000-08:00

Photo: andreajudit

When my aunt isn`t mad, she`s sad. It`s so hard to watch her cry, almoust every night. What can I do to help her?

Dedicated to Signe Engis

2010-02-07T15:12:00.000-08:00

Photo: Signe Engis

Today I want to dedicate a post to someone special: Signe.
I want you to know that I think about you,
I care and I`m afraid. I don`t want you to get thinner, emptier, more scared.
It makes me sad to see how you feel, how you`re getting smaller, emptier, each single day. Take care, you`ll be better, you`ll feel better. Someday.

Yes/No

2010-02-06T15:27:00.000-08:00

Alison Scarpella

So, has something changed after i started my new project?

Yes/No

Yes: i`m thinking more about the small things, taking choices for others, feeling a little bit more worthy.

No: Still drinking too much, wasting my time, casual sex, feeling empty and lonely.

How do you feel about yourself now a days?

Will you remember me?

2010-02-05T09:02:00.000-08:00

Tree castles

I`ll be good today:
I`ll be remembering.
Remembering summerdays, rainydays, your body against mine, your lips against mine, your hands in my hands. Your words in my ear.

Maybe I`ll send the email I should have sent ages ago. Maybe I`ll tell him:

I loved him.

Smile

2010-02-02T14:03:00.000-08:00

seaembraces

Today I`ll try to smile to everyone that passes me, and I hope you`ll do the same..
Will you?

Today

2010-01-31T08:19:00.000-08:00

Photo: Leanne Surfleet

I haven`t done anything nice to anyone, today. Just been sitting home, drinking my green tea and taking my vitamins. bLAH.

What have you done?

Feel better

2010-01-28T09:00:00.000-08:00

Today I wrote a letter to one of the best teachers I had when I studied.

It really makes me feel better to focus on the small things. Even if it`s just smiling to a foreigner.

What have you done today?

2010-01-26T12:36:00.000-08:00

Photo: cuckove

Today I filled a bag with orangejuice, bread, cheese, ham, fruit and some cookies, and gave it to a man who was sleeping in at a bench.

Have you been doing something nice, to someone, today?

One kind thing a day.

2010-01-25T09:45:00.001-08:00

Photo: gingerlilytea

I`m working with my new goal: Do small, good things, and write them down.

Today I asked our gardener if he needed some help. He said no, but I cleared away all the withered roses. He smiled, then I left.

Being a good girl.

2010-01-23T06:34:00.000-08:00

Photo: Anna Hendy

I was out shopping when I saw a girl, at my age, outside a store, crying. I asked here what was wrong, but she said that she was fine. Then I told her I would listen if she wanted to talk, and gave her my number.

Project: Be good.

2010-01-20T09:10:00.001-08:00

Source: ?

I have a new project going on in my head:
I want to do good things

I want to do a least one thing, for someone else, everyday, and I`ll write about it here. And.. I want other people to do the same: DO GOOD THINGS, and write about it afterwards. It doesn`t have to be a big thing.

Home.

2010-01-19T07:17:00.000-08:00

I`m tired of whining all the time. Starting new projects, not finishing, working with things I don`t like. I want to write, and I want to feel safe. I want to be safe. And I want a home, somewhere I don`t need to be a certain way, somwhere I don`t need to act a certain way. I want a project. A real project that will make the world a better place. I want to do something beautiful, something nice. BlahBlahBlah.

Volunteering

2010-01-16T03:00:00.000-08:00

Foto: Steve Bingham

Maybe I should try volunteering. Get some perspective.
Talk to the forgotten ones on the street, or the children playing in parks,
or old people, waiting inside tiny rooms to die.

People

2010-01-12T06:02:00.000-08:00

Photo: ?

Where do I find people to like in L.A?
Everywhere I go, I find shallow people, who only cares about their carriere. I don`t find anyone who really reach into my heart, because of their personality.
Am I blind?
Where do I find them?

Happiness 2.

2010-01-09T01:29:00.001-08:00

I try.
I do really tro.
I do try to be positive,
to write positive,
to make this a positive thing..

But there is something missin, it really is, and I can`t either describe or understand what it is. What is breaking my heart? What is tearing my apart? What is that feeling in my stomach?

I have everything I want, don`t I?

Where is home?

2010-01-07T11:05:00.000-08:00

Back in L.A. Weird to leave Norway, but also good.. Still, I don`t feel home anywhere. Is it normal? Is it a parf of being a teenager? Do any of you feel home? And what makes you feel like you`ve got a home? So many questions, so few answears..

Sexy new year?

2010-01-03T09:41:00.000-08:00

Photo: Michael Sander

I DO really make drama everywhere I go. The night ended, of course in his house, we two, alone. Of course we had sex, and we cried, I broke a lamp, he hit me and I put up a fight. Then I cried again, and, of course, we ended up having sex. AGAIN.

God, how I hate that man.

Marie Antoinette New years eve

2009-12-30T10:45:00.000-08:00

I cancelled my flight to L.A, so I`ll stay here in Norway for a couple of more days. I`m glad that I can celebrate new years eve here with my old friends, like I`ve always been doing. We`re going to a big masquaradeparty, I`ll be dressed up like Marie Antoinette, so I`ll be drinking the most expencive champagne and eat macrones. I`m going there with my ex-boyfriend, so I don`t know how the night will end....

A doll`s house

2009-12-28T13:39:00.000-08:00

They are sending me back to L.A, regardless of what I want.
Maybe it`s ok, because I don`t know, Norway is cold, and I`ll get back to the same tracks as before, I know. But still, L.A is not me, I`m living in a dollhouse, surrounded by dolls.

Winter wonderland.

2009-12-26T04:22:00.000-08:00

I left my camera in L.A, but I wish I could show you how it looks in Norway now:
Everything is covered in snow, EVERYTHING. We could hardly open the door this morning, because of all the snow. Mm. I love the snow here, but, ironically, I don`t feel like i`m home, when i`m in Norway either.. I guess L.A have managed to change me already..

Norway 1.

2009-12-21T13:29:00.000-08:00

Back in Norway, it`s cold, SO cold, I can`t move outside.. Brr.

Leaving

2009-12-18T09:38:00.000-08:00

I`m flying home to Norway in a couple of hours. Don`t know when I`ll be back, or how it will be in Norway. Are my friends still the same? Do we like the same things, and, maybe the most important thing: Am I the same? Will my father let me move home again, will i go back to L.A? I don`t know. I don`t know. I don`t know.

Comments.

2009-12-17T10:53:00.000-08:00

This comment ment so much to me:

"but doesn't it feel like part of you is in Norway?

if no, then you will not miss it

if yes, then perhaps you didn't like the part you left behind in Norway".

And it made me think of this:

Thanks to Soren Lorensen

Holiday

2009-12-16T14:34:00.000-08:00

Photo: Geoff Barenger

I`m going home to Norway in a couple of days, and for the first time I`m not shore if I want to go or not. I like my new job here, I like the boy that knocks at my window each night, and sometimes I wonder: why do I miss Norway? What did I do except from taking drugs, drinking and fucking. Nothing.

Jenny/Serena

2009-12-11T10:22:00.000-08:00

I`ve always seen myself as a person like Jenny in the latest season of Gossip girl:
strong, but lonely
inside the game, but still feeling outside

the last weeks I`ve felt like Serena: tall, blone, strong and in controle.

The actor

2009-12-10T10:36:00.000-08:00

Sorry for the lack of updates, but I`ve been really busy working and of course... Meeting a new man... An actor this time.. He is known as a hard working/drinking man, but he is kind and sweet to me.. Secretly he wants to be a write.. How sweet.

Secrets, sex, fame and money in L.A

2009-12-03T08:51:00.000-08:00

Some of my readers are wondering how I look, and what my full name is, but i`m sorry, I can`t say: My family is well-known here in L.A, and I don`t want them to get in trouble for what I do, I don`t want the magazines to find out our story, through my blog.. I guess you understand.

Sex and the city!

2009-12-01T01:44:00.000-08:00

Suddenly I remembered Sex and the city! Yeay! I love Aiden.

FRIDAY

2009-11-27T08:01:00.001-08:00

Yesterday I worked with my uncle for the very first time! All I did was: smilin, walking around asking people how they did, help them find what they were looking for, and call the securitas when a lady puked in the flowerpot. I loved it, finally I get to do something I like while earning money! <3 Yeay, LOVES!

L.A

2009-11-26T16:45:00.002-08:00

W-H-Y

D-O

E-V-E-R-Y-O-N-E

L-O-V-E

L-A?

L.A

2009-11-26T16:45:00.001-08:00

W-H-Y D-O E-V-E-R-Y-O-N-E L-O-V-E L-A?

Burberry

2009-11-25T09:48:00.000-08:00

Yesterday I bought myself a new burberrycoat! Hooray! Love, love, love!

Date

2009-11-24T09:55:00.000-08:00

Captured light

The date was ok, but he (D) was kind of boring, interested in sports and cars... The interest for drugs is probably the only thing we have in common.. HM. We went to an expencive restaurant, ate, drank wine and talked, then he took me home, and we ended up stoned in his bed. Ofc. I called our driver, and he took me home where my aunt waited. I managed to act normal, luckily.

L.A

2009-11-22T11:34:00.000-08:00

Things are getting better, I think. Been sitting in the sun, reading for an hour, and tonight i`m going out for a date, which my aunt has approved (!!). Next week i`m going to work at an opening of a new, fancy store. I guess there will be a lot of hot guys there, haha. Anyone who wants guestlist? Tell me!

Bye Bye school!

2009-11-20T05:48:00.000-08:00

Ok, I`ve quit school, and I`ll start working in my uncle`s PR-company. Woah. Now I`ll get to meet people a lot more, and spend the night out! Perfect, or what!? Still, I miss friends at my age, I can`t trust the people here, they are so obsessed with being cool enough, pretty enough, rich enough.. Blargh.

Better go to bed, it`s way too late/early.. 6 o`clock in the morning.. omg, i`m tired.

Happiness

2009-11-17T13:56:00.000-08:00

It`s time to become more happier: I have what I want, don`t I?

I`ve got: Disney films, Agent provocateur, bubblegum, memories, mac, iphone, chanel, alexander wang, a BIG bed, and a few lovers.

Remember

2009-11-15T15:43:00.000-08:00

Do you remember?

Dark nights.

2009-11-14T16:21:00.001-08:00

"In fact, you have become
All of the things you've always run from."
-The Ascent of Stan, Ben Folds Five

Familyportrait

2009-11-13T13:42:00.000-08:00

I have an uncle and a cousin here in L.A, but I`ve only visited them once since I moved her. Everyone is so busy with their own life, I just want to be free, stay up all night, close my eyes, dance. Sometimes I want to hang out with my cousin, like we did when we were younger: playing in the garden, making fun of our neighbours, but my cousins friends are It-persons and celebrities, and I guess I`ll have to join her gang to spend time with her, but I know I`ll only feel stupid and awkward around them.

School

2009-11-12T09:24:00.000-08:00

I`ve stopped doing my homework, but I am going to school, our driver are following me to the door. I don`t have the strenght to run away, starting a new life, make money.

90210

2009-11-10T15:34:00.000-08:00

I love the old Beverly hillsepisodes, they remind me of my childhood.

Family buisiness

2009-11-09T07:31:00.000-08:00

Photo: MagicMorgan

I should probably consider starting over new: waking up before school starts, do my homework, be nice, say thank you to my family for giving me money, clothes, food, everything I need, but, at the same time I feel that I should be thankful, it feels so wrong:
Why can`t I dress and say what I mean?
Why do I have to act just like my family?
Why won`t they let me take and face my choice?
Why do I have to go to school when it feels so wrong?

I know I seem like a stupid teenagegirl, but i`m so tired of following my fathers footsteps. It`s not me, I have to make my own choice.

Suddenly everything felt so hard..

2009-11-08T16:29:00.000-08:00

The last few days have been weird, don`t know how to explain, but everything feels so difficult, and I don`t even want to go out partying anymore. Been lying in my bed for a couple of days, pretending that im sick.. I`ll try to explain later today, or tomorrow.

My dad.

2009-11-06T09:04:00.000-08:00

Photo: Natalion

Why my father won`t let me come home:
1. He think that I party less in L.A (haha)
2. The school is stricter here
3. My aunt can look after me
4. I can`t talk to "my bad friends"
5. He can work instead of taking care of me

Still.. I love him.

Dad

2009-11-04T00:36:00.000-08:00

I called my father:
"I want to go home..", I said.
"You can`t", he said.
"Why?"
"You can`t"
"I can, I promise you"
"You`ve promised som many times", he said.

Norway

2009-11-02T16:11:00.000-08:00

Bharfot

I miss Norway, I miss the cold weather, the snow, the rain, the autmnleaves. I miss waking up to grey weather, to the fresh icecold air, all the people dressed in black coats, scarfes and mittens. I miss my dad, I miss home, I miss my friends, even my school. I don`t want to be an L.A`er anymore. I want to go home, so badly.

Grounded.. Again.

2009-10-30T13:46:00.000-07:00

Grounded again, got caught yesterday.. Blah, my aunt checked my room at 2 a.m, and I was of course... out partying.. Hm. Now our maid checks me every 30 minutes.. FUN. God, I hate my life, being grounded is such a waste of time.. So what can I do? Plan my trip to Costa Rica? Or maybe call a friend?? When talking about friends...

HAPPY B-DAY to lovely Belleinarms! I heart her blog.

xo

Run away

2009-10-27T15:01:00.000-07:00

glowingstar

Why not run away? Take my expencive bags, shoes and sell them? I`ll survive for a year, I guess. I want to run away so badly, just pack my bag and leave, hide in the streets, sleep outside, or at the beach, just being alone, not being controled anymore. Take an airplane to Costa rica, Cuba, Nicaragua or Peru. Don`t know where, just something nice, something different from here.

Airport.

2009-10-26T13:03:00.000-07:00

common29

Back in L.A, my aunt and our driver waited for me outside the airport: They babysit me. It makes me feel so small, i`m so used to doing what I want, when I want, without anybody asking/yelling/crying like my aunt does when I don`t get an A or when I skip school. Next year I may quit school, I want to travel around the world, see new places and meet new people and just relax and be myself.

Goodnight N.Y

2009-10-25T12:57:00.001-07:00

One more day before I live N.Y. I love it here, feel so much more relaxed, so much happier. N.Y is my style, L.A is not. I`ve bought a lovely, new chanelbag, love it! <3 Tomorrow = school, aunt and loneliness. I want to go back to my dad, I miss him, I miss him, I miss him, and at the same time i`m so angry at him for forcing me to live with my aunt in sucky L.A

New york

2009-10-22T14:22:00.000-07:00

Today i`m dancing in the streets of New York. ANy tips where to go?

Goodnight L.A

2009-10-21T16:23:00.000-07:00

Goodmorning N.Y.

I`m leaving for N.Y tonight to meet up w some friends from Norway. It will be great (and probably cold.. Brr). So whats up in N.Y for the next days? Any tips?

See you! <3

How to get happy?

2009-10-20T10:22:00.000-07:00

Okey, my new plans, for a happy and fun L.A-life.

1. Convince myself that i love L.A
2. Make my aunt think that i`m not partying when I go out
3. Do funny things when i`m grounded... (like flirting with out gardener, trying to find out if my aunt killed my xuncle, writing a book)
4. Buying all the designerbrands that I don`t get in Norway
5. Be one of the IT-girls in L.A

Anyone got some more tips? TELL ME! ;)

Garden

2009-10-19T09:45:00.000-07:00

Ivory Faces

Somedays I feel so.. weird. I don`t know how to explain, but the world doesn`t get inside of me at days like this. It`s like when I sit in my windowsill, watching the world (our garden) without being noticed.

Dying is an art.

2009-10-17T06:50:00.000-07:00

(the pic is not from his funeral...)

I`ve started to think more and more about Paul, my aunts exhusband. I remember, in Norway, 2 years ago, he gave me a braecelet who belonged to his mother, and then he told me not to forget him.. So I wonder, maybe he knew what was going to happend?

L.A Queen.

2009-10-16T09:48:00.000-07:00

Why I hate my aunt:

- she´ s superficiel

- a facadequeen

- she haven`t asked me about what I think of living with them, not once

- She always have to check how I look before going out, because everybody in L.A knows her, and she`s afraid that I will ruin the perfect picture of her family.

- (I think) she killed her old husband (which, actually, was a really nice guy)

I don`t know.

2009-10-14T09:12:00.000-07:00

http://www.theunicorndiaries.com/

My story, my life, it feels like I`ve lost it. Don’t know where, don’t know when, Norway or L.A? Who am I? I don’t know, I can`t feel anything, anymore. I don`t do anything, anymore.

Teachers.

2009-10-13T16:22:00.000-07:00

I`ve lived in L.A for 2 months now, and my american still sucks, and my teachers hate me. Sometimes I think i`m a little dyslectic, but they don`t belive me. They say that i`m spoiled and lazy, nothing more. Haha. Wish I could pay them, like I did home in Norway..

Bloglovin!

2009-10-12T12:48:00.001-07:00

Follow my blog with bloglovin

Sleeping.

2009-10-12T04:59:00.000-07:00

It`s 5 o`clock in the morning, and I can`t sleep. It makes me sick and tiiired. I`m so happy for my new friends here, they are just like me: wasting their time with alcohole, drugs and men. Haha. I`m really starting to act like a REAL L.A-girl.

Me + L.A = friends?

2009-10-10T13:34:00.000-07:00

I`ve started to feel a little bit closer to some of the people here.. They`re almoust friends now, and it feels good. But.. I still have to deal with my psychoaunt, she treats me like a child. I get SO angry, and I don`t know what to do..

Queen B

2009-10-07T17:00:00.000-07:00

Not my pic, found it here

I`m basically out every night, my aunt doesn`t have a clue (except from that one night she caugt me climbing out the window...), and I do much more alcohole and drugs then I did home in Norway. The people here are so stupid.. Tonight i`m going to the Fever ray concert, yey, guess it`ll be fun, scary and weird. I have to get to know some underground people here, not just stuffy queen B`s.

Fever ray

2009-10-06T16:39:00.000-07:00

Tomorrow i`ll try to get out to a Fever ray concert! You should go too, although, it won`t be either chanel, champagne og limo`s.. Haha. My aunt will kill me if she found out where i`m going. She would never, NEVER go to a concert like this.. (or a concert at all...)

Some of my favourite ladies

2009-10-05T14:54:00.000-07:00

Virginia Woolf, Coco chanel, Marilyn Monroe

Karin Drejer Andersson, Julia Kristeva, Madonna

<3 None of them from L.A.. What a suprise..

Grounded

2009-10-04T14:35:00.000-07:00

My aunt caught me on my way out the bedroom window, and im officially grounded (like I wasnt before.....). Haha. I have to fix it, dont know how, but not getting to go out, even at daytime, is killing me. Maybe I have to call my dad. Gah. He`ll kill me.

2009-10-03T09:27:00.001-07:00

I don`t remember where I found this, but I know: this is how I feel.

Gossip girl

2009-09-30T10:17:00.001-07:00

I remember sitting home in Norway, watching Gossip girl.. Now I feel like i`m a part of the show, and it`s not quite as funny as on tv. C doesn`t call, and I`ve seen pictures of him in different magazinea, with different girls, of course. The gardener doesn`t say much, but he knows that i`m watching him.

Money ofc.

2009-09-28T03:33:00.000-07:00

i`m approved by the it-girls at the school, and the (L.A)reason is of course: money.

Anna Anka.

2009-09-26T11:22:00.000-07:00

I`m following the newspapers home in Norway, and they really prove what I think about L.A, by showing

She`s an exactly copy of my aunt.
God, how I hate most of the people here.

WOW

2009-09-25T11:07:00.000-07:00

I managed to get out yesterday too, and the celebrityguy (from now on called B) took me out to the most wonderfull party ever!! For the first time I actually liked (loved?) L.A! It was not that upperclass, but it was balloons, cupcakes, layes and layes with laces, expencive dresses and ofcourse.. Champagne! Wow. We danced all night, and when I my driver arrived, B kissed me in my neck, and said that I was the most beautiful girl he`d ever seen. I don`t know what to say, but it feel so right, it feels so fine.

Agent provocateur.

2009-09-24T10:36:00.000-07:00

I got a present from the "B-celebrityguy" today! (don`t want to tell anyone his name yet..). He asked me out again, to this big, exclusive celebrityparty! Wow, I have to find some way to get out after my aunt has gone to bed.. Hum! I love the fact that BC already is giving me expencive lingerine. Mm, he`s got to be the perfect man.

Breakfast

2009-09-22T15:36:00.000-07:00

My aunt is taking us out for breakfast every morning, before school starts (!). We`re always getting served big amounts of... everything, but we (me and my cousin) never get to eat what we want. I guess that`s what L.A is all about: See, don`t touch.

Tomorrow we`re going to Cecconi`s.

Clubbing

2009-09-20T09:43:00.000-07:00

I climbed out my bedroomwindow and made our driver drive me to a club. He promised too keep quiet about it when I gave him a smile and promised some extra cash. I met a tall, dark man on the club, we kept on dancing for hours and drank lots of champagne. He held my hand and I told him my story, how I hate this place and that my aunt won`t let me out. He asked me to keep quiet and kissed me instead of answearing my story.

The sun is always shining

2009-09-18T10:08:00.000-07:00

The sun always shine in L.A, but still I have to beg for hours before my aunt will let me go to the beach. I`m going there by myself, don`t want to spend time with people I don`t like.

Yesterday I noticed this hot gardener outside my window, wow, I`m SO getting to know him. I hope he`ll help me out of this prison!

L.A

2009-09-17T03:01:00.001-07:00

It`s late, but I can`t sleep, I am stuck in a big, empty house, with empty people.

Everything has always been easy for me, too easy (and it still is): You can fix anything with money. I was born here in the US, but moved to Norway when I was three years old. Now I`m back and I hate it. I hate this country and I hate my life. I hate my school, my aunt and the facades of precariousness and sorrow.

At least, my secrets remain secret and dreams remain dreams. I got a big house with a cat, a garden with flowers and a wardrobe filled with silk. And no one will ever take my voice away.